If only there were a magic pill that would always make children do what parents ask. Whoever invented that pill would be a multi-billionaire. Parents around the world would be able to enjoy their meals in peace and always have a clean house and never have to chase their child into the street shouting, "Come back here this instant!" Unfortunately, such a pill does not exist, and parents are forced to get creative to get their kids to do what they ask.
New and seasoned parents alike have difficulty coming up with effective ways to get their kids to do what they ask. Many times it can seem like an impossible chore. Sometimes you find something that works one day yet it doesn’t work the next. Sometimes you find a trick that works wonders for a friend’s child but your child doesn’t respond to it at all.
How to get a kid to do what parents ask. Here are 4 parenting tips.
Every child is different, and they respond best to different techniques at different ages. This can make it hard to get kids to do what parents ask. But instead of trying to find specific techniques to get your child to do what you ask try to step back and focus on the mindsets behind the techniques. These mindsets stay the same from day to day and age to age. And within these mindsets you can incorporate a smorgasbord of techniques.
1. Be consistent.
No matter the age of the child consistency is the most important aspect of getting kids to do what parents ask. Say what you mean and mean what you say. Be consistent with consequences and rules. And don’t change the rules without first explaining the change to your child.
2. Be clear.
The best way to set expectations is to document your directions and wishes on a chore wheel or chore chart. There's no confusion when the child can see and interact with your instructions.
3. Get on their level.
Squat down to your 4-year-old to tell them to stay in the yard. Text your teenager to remind them to be home by 8. Whatever the age of your child, communicate to them in a way that’s appropriate, understanding and engaging.
4. Help your child problem solve.
If your toddler wants to eat while playing with a toy give them an option of "food" or "toy." They get to pick which one they really want. If your teenager wants to go to a friend's house but their room isn't clean ask them how they can accomplish both. Give your child appropriate control and problem-solving ability over their life. They will surprise you and be grateful you trust them enough with this responsibility.